I'm Too Tired to Party - The Celebrity Exhaustion Epidemic

It's a sad day in celebrity party land. They've lost another to the horrific epidemic that is and has been sweeping this country coast to coast. Yes, I'm referring to the dreaded Exhaustion. It usually strikes the young Hollywood set at the peak of their party days and doesn't let up until they have received thorough treatment at either the Beverly Hills hospital or the spa/resort rehabilitation center. They work so hard on their craft that they barely have time to drink a glass of water or ingest a sandwich. Sadly this leads to severe dehydration, malnutrition, insomnia, and the final phase rib protrusion.

The most recent victim of Celebrity Exhaustion is none other than celebrity DJ Samantha Ronson aka Lindsay Lohan's lesbian phase girlfriend. Poor Poor Samantha. With her demanding DJ schedule what was to be expected?! She flies back and forth across the country, with only a first class lounge chair to rest her weary head on. Then she is supposed to muster the energy to attend the various parties and social gatherings where she works so hard playing other people's music. The horror! Not only does she have to push buttons, look bored, and accept free drinks all at the same time...she also has to keep the wandering eye of her attached at the hip gf Lindsay in line. This could go on until 4 or 5 in the morning! No wonder the poor thing is exhausted and needs some serious drug-induced sleep. If I were her, I would up my DJ fee from $25,000 per gig to at least 6 figures. Any job where you experience this much pain and suffering should pay off big time.

I guess we have to give it to Samantha for actually showing up for work though. She could just cancel all of her gigs like Entourage star Jeremy Piven. Jeremy recently dropped out of the Broadway production of "Speed-the-Plow" because of his own personal Exhaustion struggle. Sure Jeremy had enough energy just a couple weeks ago to attend Britney Spears bday party, several strip clubs, and various late night festivities, but exhaustion strikes when you least expect it. These celebs run themselves down so much with all of their social demands that who can expect them to honor a commitment to something as unimportant as being the lead actor in a Broadway play? Sure the play has lost hundreds of thousands of dollars since his departure last week, but the guy is sick. If you haven't heard the complete story, it seems that he became exhausted after eating too much sushi. Now I've had my fair share of sushi, and yes it is a very tiring experience. Sometimes the pieces are so large you can barely fit them in your mouth. Then you have serious chewing to undertake, followed by a large swallow or two. I won't even get into the drowsiness I feel after using too much wasabi...those tears don't come for free. Jeremy is a known sushi-fanatic so I can completely understand that if he was eating this Japanese favorite two, maybe three times a day he had to be seriously tuckered out! I'd put my money on him not being able to lift chop sticks for at least a few more weeks.

So there you have it. Celebrity Exhaustion has taken down two more of our greatest artists at the prime of their careers. I can only hope that they find some rest and relaxation at one of the many tropical island resorts that take in these poor souls over the holidays. My best to both of them and wishes for a speedy recovery!