For those of you unfamiliar with The Woolen Mill, allow me to start with a description of a little place called Frankenmuth. Michiganders will surely need no explanation for this quirky and unique place, but for the rest of our out-of-state readers I'll do my best to give you the picture. Frankenmuth is a little town north of Flint that was modeled after a German village. The architecture is straight out of Bavaria in Southern Germany and while it's extremely cheesy and totally kitchy it's fun for one day a year to get into the Thanksgiving/Christmas spirit and stuff your face with the famous Zehnder's chicken dinners.
Since the mid-eighties my parents have bundled me and my two siblings up and made the annual pilgramage to Frankenmuth for one Sunday every October/November for what Nick mockingly named, Archibald Family Fun Day, and every year we do the exact same thing. First we head to the shopping village where we take an old fashioned photo (there's literally one for every year of my life) but this year...no doubt due to the economic times...we found a music shop in place of the Michigan nostalgia shop. And as much as I thought I hated this part of the day, when it wasn't there anymore I kinda missed donning the fishnets, feather hairpiece, and barmaid outfit in order to hold a fake gun, fake money, and fake half full beer mug in front of the saloon backdrop. But don't worry my Dad is looking for another place that takes old fashioned photos so as not to create a gap in the yearly photos!
Next we head over to Zehnders or Bavarian Inn where the chicken dinners are offered and we eat all the buttery noodles, salad, chicken, mashed potatoes, and desserts we can fit into our mouths until we have to unsnap our pants in order to keep breathing. Next we walk off the chicken by meandering down the main street and always end up at The Woolen Mill where you can find the most hideous of reindeer and jingle bell encrusted Christmas Sweaters, slippers, socks, and most importantly gloves and mittens. As is tradition, we all pick out a new pair of mittens or gloves for the winter season and unlike years past where I would automatically gravitate toward a sleek pair of black leather or wool gloves I wandered the store for a few moments taking in the beaded caftans, Ugg boots, and thick comfy blankets and that's when I saw them... It took me a minute to figure out exactly what I was looking at because I'm pretty sure I've never seen anything like these little guys before but staring back at me in a soft aqua and pastel yellow fleece was something called the "Lovers Glove". I immediately moved in and grabbed one off the rack to get a closer look, and sure enough it's a mitten/glove intended to allow a couple hold hands in one "glove" while the outside hands stay toasty warm in their own mittens. I scooped up three off the rack, one for me and my "luvaa" and the other's for 2 lucky couples, (you can send in your essays about why you and your significant other deserve the Lover's Glove!) who will be receiving these little gems this Christmas! Seriously, where do people come up with this stuff? First, what guy is going to want to wear this, you take an already cheesy idea and then you make it in pastel aqua and yellow, and they had pink and green as well! Secondly, any couple that needs to be touching hands at all times even when outdoors in a 20° blizzard makes me want to gag, give it a rest people! .JPG)
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I pity the poor guy who recieves this as a serious gift from his gf/wife and has to go out in public wearing it, he'll be mocked for years if any of his friends see him! Nick and I couldn't stop laughing when we were wearing the Lover's Glove, it's just too funny! It is however quite cozy and warm, but that doesn't matter, we are not that couple!! So for anyone who wants to witness a funny moment when their "luvaa" opens up their stocking this year, check out the Lover's Glove, it's sure to entertain!.JPG)
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3 comments:
My essay about why Nick and I should receive a pair will be sent to you shortly.
That's hilarious Marc. Leigh, I'd also like to submit an essay about why I deserve a pair. I think it would be fitting for me to just wear it as/is on my hand alone. It would be symbolic.
I am the proud owner of The Woolen Mill featuring, as you say, "hideous reindeer and jingle bell encrusted sweaters and of course the Lovers Glove...."
The "Lovers Glove" has a story.... (not to top Sir Paul of course) Last winter I was at an apparel market in Vegas buying socks and accessories for fall delivery. Upon completion of the order I saw leg warmers and I had no choice. I am a child of the 80's, I HAD to order them! At that point I didn't really care if they sold or not, I bought them more to see the reaction of our guests. Which has been quite fun I might add.
Anyway, the sales rep was horrified by my insistance of adding leg warmers and said, "Next you'll probably want to buy the "Lovers Glove."
And now you know the rest of the story.
As far as Lisa's comment is concerned I would be remiss if I didn't comment on the features and benefits of the Lovers Glove. If you have a "luvaa" then they can/should be worn as pictured in your blog. If you are foot-loose and fancy-free however, then you have a choice. Wear just the two mittens or wear the double cuff as an old-fashioned muffler. You just can't go wrong with the Lover's Glove. It's a must have!
You have inspired me to a higher level of kitsch - the two mannequins as you walk in the door are holding hands in the Lovers Glove (black and grey colored)!
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